Solo Living Joys & Struggles (From a Grown-Ass Woman Who’s done Both)
Living solo is kind of like cheese: sometimes it's gloriously aged and delicious, other times it smells weird and makes you question your life choices. But after years of coupledom, cohabiting, and the occasional "who ate my leftovers?" argument, I can confidently say that solo living as a woman in her late forties (almost 50) comes with a gloriously (un)complicated list of liberating highs and occasional lonely lows.
Here's the real talk on what it's like when it's just you, your vibes, and maybe a few throw pillows too many.
The Joys: Sweet, Delicious Autonomy
1. You Own the Clock. No more synced-up sleep schedules or negotiated wake-up calls. If I want to stay up binge-watching YouTube until midnight with a charcuterie board balanced on my chest, I dang well will. Want to nap at 5 p.m. and call that dinner? Done.
2. Sprawl Queen Status Activated. I sleep like a starfish on a Tempur-Pedic throne. Pillows everywhere. I snore like a banshee, I toot when I need to, and I hog the duvet like it owes me money. There is no one to complain, and honestly? That’s healing.
3. No More Boring Small Talk. Remember the post-work recap ritual? "How was your day?" Insert fake smile and emotional buffering. Now, if I’ve had a rough one, I can opt out of human interaction entirely. Silence is golden. Especially after peopling all freakin’ day.
4. The Bathroom is a Femme Fantasy. Hair on the shower wall? Yes. Makeup-stained counters? Of course. Fancy product bottles, cute storage bins, faux flower bundles, a whole shrine to bath bombs? You bet. It’s a maximalist mecca of self-expression and no man to side-eye it.
The Struggles: Because Balance, Baby
1. Weekend Drift Syndrome. Without plans or a routine, I can morph into a human blanket burrito. Sleeping in becomes a sport (about the only one I do - guilty). Suddenly it’s noon, I haven’t brushed my teeth, and I’m Googling if cheddar counts as protein.
2. The Winter Hermit Spiral. When it’s -20°C and Netflix asks if I’m still watching, the answer is yes – and also maybe send help. It gets real quiet, real fast. And those cozy solo nights can sometimes feel more isolating than peaceful.
3. Human Contact Isn’t Overrated. There are days when all you want is a hug that doesn’t feel like effort. Or someone to rub your shoulders. Or a back scratch that doesn’t involve reaching like a sad yoga pretzel or using a novelty claw.
4. Bathroom Chaos, Unchecked. Without a shared space, the inner tornado is real. Makeup, hair, towels, products everywhere. And while no one’s judging, sometimes a little accountability would save me from cleaning only when I’ve run out of surfaces.
Living Alone Is a Mood And a Practice
Solo living is equal parts luxury and lesson. You learn to honour your rhythms, to feel safe in your silence, and to be your own company. But you also learn to call friends when it gets too quiet, and that sometimes you need to light a candle and pretend you're on a date with your best self.
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